Sunday, October 17, 2010

Why we are here...

I'been wondering about how to start this blog. I decided that I don't want to tell my/our history from the start, as we have been living in this country for the last 13 years. It would be a lot to tell. But I'm willing to share a little about us, just to give you an idea about who's behind these words. Well, making a long history short, we're a Brazilian gay couple whom have been together for 14 years. We fled Brazil because my partner's strong family opposition to our relationship after he decided to come out of the closet. I was insulted, our young small business was wrecked because of public demonstrations of hate from his mother and I was firmly asked to leave him alone, which I did in respect to my own peace of mind, although my heart was broken. But he was persistent to the point that I accepted him back after he came up with the extrem idea of leaving the country for us to live in peace somewhere else. The natural choice was the United States of America, because of his acquaintance with the country from the time he was an exchange student. Then  we came. The start was rough, let me tell you! I barely spoke any English and had a difficult time adapting to the new culture. He was just fantastic in every way possible. He helped me A LOT in making me feel confortable here. Than came the fatidic and tragical September the eleventh and we were born again Americans in blood and tears. After more than a decade from the day we set foot in the land of the free, we're both proud American citizens. We have a lot to thank this magnificent country. Fortunately, after so many years of self-exile, lots of "saudades" of our families, friends and the country itself, finally my partner's mother came to her senses and decided to accept him for who he is, a loving, honest, hard working, good hearted, resourceful and LOYAL son. Recently we traveled back to our hometown, Sao Paulo, were I was properly introduced to his parents. Finally we're all in peace. All that is left to say is that our souls are Brazilian because we were born in Brazil, but our hearts are American by choice and always will be. Hope you enjoy your time reading our ideas and making your comments we will be looking forward to reading what you have to say. Thanks.



Rachel said...

I almost wrote a post WHO IS RAY ADKINS? Great to finally meet you and Gil! I hope you two become very active in your posting! I would love to hear the view of ex-pats from the other side.

On a different note, I am so sorry you two had to go through so much but these kind of things have a tendency of bringing people closer. I'm happy to hear fences have been mending and I'm glad my country, while hard at first, welcomed you in and made you feel at home.

Welcome to blogger land. I hope you like it :D

Gil and Ray said...

Dear Rachel,

Welcome to American Heart, Brazilian Soul.
I have to say that you found my blog before I ever laid eyes on it...yes, Gil set it up and didn't tell me about it.
Then one day he told me someone had posted a comment for me on OUR blog...OUR BLOG? I replied... :)
So, he started telling me about our blog and told me to get in here, answer you and start writing.
One month later, here I am, finally learned the very basics and got in and started writing.
I have told you how much I enjoy your blog more than once, I also love your sense of humor, creativity and your free spirit.
Welcome again Rachel and I hope you enjoy our blog as much as we enjoy yours.


Sara and Nate said...


I am so excited to finally meet the man with endless knowledge!! I am going to love reading your perspective of life in America. Keep up the writing and I will be reading.

Gil and Ray said...

Dear Sara,

Thanks for the kind words, Welcome to our blog!
Man with endless knowledge? wait a minute, I should get you to write a recommendation on my linked in page :)
I have also been enjoying your experiences in Brazil.
We actually have somethings in common, I played football and went to school in Oklahoma, still have friends and family over there, watch every Pokes game ;) , I have a brother who went to OSU and another one that works in the oil industry and is in Macae every other this a small world or what?
Good to see you here Sara.

Take care


fiona said...

Ray and Gil,
That is such an adorable way of beginning a blog! (as a surprise!) I am so glad that you're going to be blogging now. This is a nice introduction to who you are and why you are in the US. Electronic beijos!

Sara and Nate said...

That is so crazy! Small world is right. This weekend I hope you wear your orange for the bedlam game :)

Ray Adkins said...

You bet I did! Also had about 80 friends from Oklahoma on Facebook making minute by minute comments on the game.
Just so you know, my mother has an ORANGE Pokes Christmas tree and a OSU Tiffany Desk Lamp...just to name a few things...
I will make a post about OSU in my family soon.

Fabio Bossard said...

So Ray is Brazilian!
I always thought you were American because of your perfect English or how you referred to yourself as American.
I am also sorry to hear your story. It's sad that you had to leave your country because some people can't accept you for who you are. But luckily you found a new home in a different land.

Gil and Ray said...


Thanks for your kind words, I think my English is far from perfect, it's actually a work in progress.
I just would like to make it clear that I never mentioned my nationality as being American to deceive anyone, I really am naturalized American citizen and today I do identify more with the United States than with Brazil, I do feel almost like a foreigner when visiting my family in Sao Paulo, I know it sounds strange but it is our reality.
However, yes, I was born in Brazil and I am very proud to be a Paulista da gema, born in Sao Bernardo do Campo "Terra Matter" ;)
I have been in the US off and on since I was 17 years old, High School, College and University, that has helped me understand the culture very well and at times sound like a native.
It was sad to have to leave Sao Paulo for the reasons we left, because we were happy in Brazil, we had a good life and a future and we had to give that up along with family and friends because of homophobia, we were tired, we came in search of peace of mind.
However it could have been worse, my relatives escaped religious persecution in France for being Jews, they had a much tougher time than we could even comprehend, but that is subject for another post perhaps. However I tend to see the cup half full, always.
Welcome to our blog, I hope you enjoy reading about our experiences as Brazilian Expats in the US.

Take care